The Human Sanctuary and Temple of God-8 quotes

In marriages where one of the spouses is an unbeliever, how can we practically manifest the true noble kind of the emotion of love, affection and passion, and thus cleanse ourselves from the wrong kind of these emotions?

“If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away. And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace. For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save thy husband? or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save thy wife?” 1 Corinthians 7:12-16.

These verses show us that if you are married to an unbeliever, whether you chose to marry them while they were an unbeliever, or whether you converted to the faith after marriage and they chose not to convert, you do not have any Biblical right or justification to seek to divorce and end the marriage with them just because of they are an unbeliever.

Your marriage vow and promise to your spouse was not based upon them being a believer, but was based upon their faithfulness, fidelity and commitment to love you and you to love them as long as you both should live. So as long as your unbelieving spouse remains faithful to you and does not commit adultery, then they are keeping their vow to you, and thus you will remain married to them in God’s eyes until they die.

Under these conditions pray to God to forgive you for getting yourself bound in such an unequal marriage, and then plead with Him to provide you with all the extra grace and strength you need to endure and live up to the full stature of a man or woman in Christ Jesus. This is because God stated that “the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the (believing) wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the (believing) husband”.

The Greek word for “sanctified” used here is “hagiazo”, which translates and means “to make holy, purify, consecrate, sanctify” (Strong’s Exhaustive Concordance, word #37). So by the holy life and Godly actions of the believing spouse allowing Christ to live through them and not self, then these holy influences would work more and more to influence the unbelieving spouse to become more holy and purified in their life as well.

By choosing to remain living with an unbelieving spouse, even though it will be much more difficult and trying, yet allowing the grace of God to help you maintain your faith and obedience to God under any and all circumstances, will be the means of gradually influencing them to follow your example and become holy. Dear one, you may be the only one whom God can use to effectively reach the heart of your unbelieving spouse, and awaken them to salvation!

What if your unbelieving spouse does not allow you to keep your faith and remain obedient to God, or they make life so difficult that it is impossible for you to do so? This would then fall under the situation of abuse in the marriage, and as we learned earlier, in marriages where physical or mental abuse is occurring, God does not require any of His followers to remain living with such an abusive spouse.

What if the unbelieving spouse chooses to leave you, and perhaps even divorces you? In this unfortunate situation we learned that God plainly tells His people that “if the unbelieving depart, let him depart”. The Greek word for “depart” used here is “ehoreo”, which translates and means “to be given space” (Strong’s, word #5562). So if the unbelieving spouse chooses to go and live somewhere else apart from you, then you are not to prevent them leaving, no matter how emotionally painful this separation might be.

God then further declared that “A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases”. And what was the reason for this? Because “God hath called us to peace”. The Greek word for “bondage” used here is “douloo”, and it translates and means “to enslave, be under bondage, become a servant” (Strong’s, word #1402). So this is not dealing with the validity of the marriage vow with your spouse, but is dealing with you remaining living together with the unbeliever in the same home.

If your unbelieving spouse leaves you, you are not to prevent them departing and living elsewhere. This is because you are not a slave or servant under bondage to the point that you are forced against your will to continue living with them under such unfavorable conditions to your spirituality. Life will be so much more easier in serving God without having to live with an unbelieving spouse who is constantly endangering your faith and walk with God, and thereby creating an atmosphere of bickering, division and dissension in the marriage. This is why God plainly declared that He “hath called us to peace” in this particular situation, and in order to achieve this peace God plainly states that none of His followers are forced as a slave to have to endure living in turmoil with an unbelieving spouse.

I hope you can see that these verses are not teaching that if the unbelieving spouse leaves and departs from you, then the marriage vow is immediately broken and you are now free to remarry. But it simply means that if they leave, you are not under bondage to continue living together with them, because you are now free to live by yourself in peace in serving God and keeping your spiritual life growing and advancing in Christ Jesus.

Again, the only way a marriage can end and you can then be free to remarry in God’s eyes, is if your spouse commits adultery against you, or they should die. If neither of these two things have occurred, then you are still married to your spouse in God’s eyes, even though a divorce may have already been legally granted. God is greater in authority than any Government or State, and thus it is His law and the principles of His truth that are to be the absolute guide of life to all of His true followers.

By choosing to follow God’s will in this matter, you would be expressing and manifesting the true self-denying and self-sacrificing type of this emotion of love, affection and passion. This would show that you are cleansing yourself from the wrong Satanic kind of this emotion, and thus revealing that God is truly dwelling in you and not Lucifer. But if you knowingly choose not to follow God’s will in this matter, then you would be expressing and manifesting the false self-pleasing and selfish type of this emotion of love, affection and passion. This would show that you are making yourself more filthy, and thus reveal that Lucifer is truly dwelling in you and not God.

What about cases where the parents or siblings or grandparents of the husband or wife are meddling in their marital or family affairs? In this situation, how can we practically manifest the true noble kind of the emotion of love, affection and passion, and thus cleanse ourselves from the wrong kind of these emotions?

This verse reveals it to be God’s will that when a man and a woman unite together in holy wedlock and become of one flesh, they are then to leave the homes of their parents. This means that they are not to move in with their parents and live there, but are to live elsewhere.

“And Caleb said, He that smiteth Kirjathsepher, and taketh it, to him will I give Achsah my daughter to wife. And Othniel the son of Kenaz, the brother of Caleb, took it: and he gave him Achsah his daughter to wife. And it came to pass, as she came unto him, that she moved him to ask of her father a field: and she lighted off her ass; and Caleb said unto her, What wouldest thou? Who answered, Give me a blessing; for thou hast given me a south land; give me also springs of water. And he gave her the upper springs, and the nether springs.” Joshua 15:16-19.

In these verses we see that after Othniel and Achsah were married, they obtained land of their own to live on and begin their family life together without them living with their parents. So even though the land they were living on was Caleb’s property, yet they were not living in Caleb’s house, but were living separate from it.

Why is it God’s will for the newly married couple to leave the homes of their parents and live separate from them? Because their marriage and union together in one flesh has now made them a family unit all of their own. This new family unit of theirs is distinct and separate from all other family units – including the family units they were born into, grew up and once lived in. As this is true, then God has declared it to be His will that each family unit is to retain their distinctness by living separate from all other family units, including their parent’s.

Since the husband and wife have now become their own distinct family unit, then this means they are now in charge and control over all issues pertaining to their own family. And as their family unit is separate and distinct from all other family units, then this also means that any and all family matters and issues occurring within their own family unit are to remain within the circle or confines of their own family unit, and are not to be shared with members of other family units – including their parents. What sense does it make for your family unit to live distinct from all other family units, but yet allow other family members to know about the personal affairs and problems of your own family? I hope you can see that as it is God’s will for the newly married couple to live as their own family unit separate and distinct from their parents, so then it is also His will that any and all affairs occurring within each family unit are to remain separate and distinct from the knowledge of all other family units.

There is nothing wrong in seeking counsel from others, especially parents, in areas where guidance is needed in order to make a good and informed decision. Yet whatever family issues or problems occur within your own family unit are not to be shared or disclosed with any one else – including your parents.

“For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.” Mark 10:7-9.

The Greek word for “asunder” is “chorizo”, which translates and means, “to place room between, to part, to go away” (Strong’s, word #5563). So then these verses show us that since God has joined this husband and wife together as one flesh in their sacred marriage and holy wedlock, and that they are ever to cleave and press closer to each other, then God forbids any other person from doing anything that would cause space to occur between the husband and wife and lead them to part or go away or separate from each other.

There are various ways in which someone can put asunder a marriage by causing a husband and wife to not cleave and press ever closer together, but to instead grow apart. Such ways would include interfering, or meddling or intruding into their marital or family affairs. Or trying to wean the affections of one spouse from the other, or pit one against the other. Etc. Doing any of these wicked actions is working to cause various degrees of space or separation to occur between the husband and wife, and thus is preventing them from following God’s will in growing and pressing ever closer together in one flesh.

God forbids any relative, friend or any other person from coming in-between the closeness of any husband and wife in any way, which would include interfering, meddling or intruding in their family affairs. And especially does this prohibition of God apply to parents!

3) It is often the case, that because parents have spent so many years raising and guiding their children, and are also so very anxious for their children to avoid the various pitfalls and problems that they know will arise in any marriage, that they become very free with their advice and counsel to their married children, and at times their advice becomes more like commands. This can especially be true with a strong-willed mother who is determined to play a part in guiding the personal affairs of her daughter after she is married.

But all these types of overbearing parental guidance and counsel immediately places their adult child in a very uncomfortable position. If their married child does not follow their counsel, then they feel like they are disobeying their parents, and thus breaking God’s commandment. But if the child obeys their parent’s counsel, then they feel like they are betraying their spouse by letting their parents rule in the marriage. An even worse case scenario occurs when both sets of parents oppose each other on a particular issue, and then each goes to work to influence their own child in the marriage to follow their advice in opposition to the other.

Dear parents, all these types of interfering, meddling and intruding into the marital and family affairs of your children is wicked and self-serving. It is not really seeking what is best for your child, but instead is seeking what is best for you. It is not working to bring your child closer to their spouse, but is instead working to divide and separate your child from their spouse so that you can have room a space in-between them in their marriage! By interfering, meddling and intruding into the marital and family affairs of your children shows that you are not in harmony with God’s will at all, but you are actually breaking God’s command to not do anything that will put their marriage asunder! Your children have every God-given right to guide and control the affairs of their own family unit without you or any other person interfering in their family matters.

What should the married couple do when one or more of their parents are strong-willed and are seeking to control things in their marriage? You are to politely thank them for their counsel, and then let them know that after both you and your spouse have had time to consider their counsel, that you will either choose to follow it or choose to disregard it according to what you both believe is best for your marriage and family unit. In this way, you have gently let your parents know that they are not the ones in control of your marital and family affairs, you are; but you still appreciate their counsel, guidance and help when necessary. And if this gentle approach does not curb your parents attempts at trying to control your marriage, then you may be forced to politely tell them that they are no longer welcome to call you or visit you until they can honor your wishes and respect the sanctity of your marriage in this matter.

As it is God’s plainly stated will that married children are to live outside of their parents home, then this means that if the soon to be husband and wife do not have enough money to move out and live by themselves, then they should not get married until they are financially able to do so. In the olden days, before a man could marry a woman he had to first provide a suitable dowry to the parents of the daughter (Genesis 29:18, 34:12; Exodus 22:17). And usually after the marriage, the parents would give this dowry amount to their daughter in order to help her marriage become more financially stable. This custom was a safeguard which prevented the couple from getting married too quickly, and also prevented lazy and deadbeat men from being able to marry and father children, which would only cause all kinds of unnecessary problems and misery if they did.

4) After married children have left the home of their parents and are no longer living under their authority and control, then does this mean that they no longer have to keep the 5th commandment to honor and obey their parents? No.

“But he answered and said unto them (Jewish Church leaders), Why do ye also transgress the commandment of God by your tradition? For God commanded, saying, Honour thy father and mother: and, He that curseth father or mother, let him die the death. But ye say, Whosoever shall say to his father or his mother, It [all my property and money] is a gift [to the church], by whatsoever thou [the church leaders] mightest be profited by me; And honour not his father or his mother [by taking care of them], he shall be free. Thus have ye made the commandment of God of none effect by your tradition.” Matthew 15:3-6.

These verses reveal that the 5th commandment is still very much in force even after the children have married and have families of their own. They are to still honor their parents, and provide for their needs if necessary. Therefore if you do not honor and obey your parents, including in their old age, then you have broken God’s commandment and thereby have committed sin. And this sin will keep you out of the kingdom of heaven by causing you to suffer the second death in the lake of fire, unless you sincerely repent and change your attitude towards your parents.

“...(Those who are) disobedient to parents...Who knowing the judgment of God, that they which commit such things are worthy of death, not only do the same, but have pleasure in them that do them.” Romans 1:30, 32.

By choosing to follow God’s will in these areas and not allowing anyone to interfere, meddle or intrude into your marital and family affairs, but keeping any family issues or problems within your own family circle and not sharing it with others outside of your family unit, then you would be expressing and manifesting the true self-denying and self-sacrificing type of this emotion of love, affection and passion. This would show that you are cleansing yourself from the wrong Satanic kind of this emotion, and thus revealing that God is truly dwelling in you and not Lucifer. But if you knowingly choose not to follow God’s will in these matters, then you would be expressing and manifesting the false self-pleasing and selfish type of this emotion of love, affection and passion. This would show that you are making yourself more filthy, and thus reveal that Lucifer is truly dwelling in you and not God.

What about those among us that have suffered through failed marriages, have been divorced and then have been remarried perhaps more than once, and then have realized that you did not have a Biblical right to remarry at all? In this situation, how can you practically manifest the true noble kind of the emotion of love, affection and passion, and thus cleanse yourself from the wrong kind of these emotions?

“And he (John the Baptist) came into all the country about Jordan, preaching the baptism of repentance for the remission of sins...Then said he to the multitude that came forth to be baptized of him, O generation of vipers, who hath warned you to flee from the wrath to come? Bring forth therefore fruits worthy of repentance, And now also the ax is laid unto the root of the trees: every tree therefore which bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire....Then came also publicans to be baptized, and said unto him, Master, what shall we do? And he said unto them, Exact no more than that which is appointed you. And the soldiers likewise demanded of him, saying, And what shall we do? And he said unto them, Do violence to no man, neither accuse any falsely; and be content with your wages.” Luke 3:3, 7-9, 12-14.

These verses reveal to us several things that can apply in this particular issue dealing with the unknowing sin of being remarried after your divorce without Biblical justification. The first thing you should do is to fully and sincerely repent for this sin. This confession and repentance is to be made to your current spouse whom you had no Biblical right to marry, and to your previous spouse whom you have committed adultery against by remarrying (Matthew 19:9; Mark 10:11-12), and then to God since it was His law which you broke. The next thing you should do is to bring forth fruits to the glory of God in harmony with your repentance, by determining with God’s divine strength and grace that you will keep all of God’s commandments from that point on, and especially that you will never commit the same sin of marrying someone whom you had no Biblical justification to marry.

What should you then do about your current non-Biblically justifiable marriage? You will notice in these verses that when the tax collectors and the Roman soldiers asked John what shall they do after repentance, he mentioned nothing about changing the position they were in before they truly repented. John did not tell the tax collectors that they needed to quit their job in order to show forth fruits worthy of their repentance. And neither did John tell the Roman soldiers that they needed to leave the army. He simply told both that from that point on they were to keep God’s law in all areas of their life, and especially in their dealings with others.

“...as the Lord hath called every one, so let him walk. And so ordain I in all churches. Is any man called being circumcised? let him not become uncircumcised. Is any called in uncircumcision? let him not be circumcised....Let every man abide in the same calling wherein he was called....Brethren, let every man, wherein he is called, therein abide with God.” 1 Corinthians 7:17-18, 20, 24.

This would then also show that after you have sincerely repented for your sin of remarriage, you would not need to then dissolve your current marriage even though it was originally unbiblical, but from that point on you would need to determine to be a true obedient follower of God in all areas. Even though your remarriage originally took place without God’s approval, yet you have indeed become of one flesh with your new spouse and are indeed vowed and committed to them for life. So after your confession you must believe that God has accepted your sincere repentance, and has truly forgiven your sin, and thus there is no need to break up your current marriage.

“(The prophet Nathan said to king David) Wherefore hast thou despised the commandment of the LORD, to do evil in his sight? thou hast killed Uriah the Hittite with the sword, and hast taken his wife to be thy wife...And David said unto Nathan, I have sinned against the LORD. And Nathan said unto David, The LORD also hath put away thy sin; thou shalt not die. Howbeit, because by this deed...the child also that is born unto thee shall surely die....And David comforted Bathsheba his wife, and went in unto her, and lay with her: and she bare a son, and he called his name Solomon: and the LORD loved him.” 2 Samuel 12:9, 13-14, 24.

These verses show that David had no Biblical right to take and marry Bathsheba, but he did so anyway. David then clearly understood that what he had done was sin, and then truly and sincerely repented as Psalms chapter 51 shows, and then God truly and fully forgave him. You will then notice that God did not tell David or Bathsheba that they must dissolve their original unbiblically justifiable marriage, but God instead showed them that He had now accepted their marriage by blessing them with their son Solomon whom God loved.

This fact reveals to us some truly amazing things. This shows us dear ones that God is so very merciful and tender hearted towards each and every one of His erring children! This also shows us that when we sincerely repent and God then forgives us, His forgiveness is complete – meaning that our past sin is fully removed and is made as if we had never sinned in the first place. This is how God could bless David and Bathsheba’s marriage together after repentance, whereas before repentance He could not. And finally, this shows us that God accepts us in the position we are in when we sincerely come to Him through Jesus Christ and fully repent of our sins, and that He does not ask us to change our position, but from that point on we are to go and sin no more!

By choosing to follow God’s will by not dissolving your unbiblical marriage, but instead sincerely repenting to God for your sin and then determining from that point on to serve, obey and abide with God, then you would be expressing and manifesting the true self-denying and self-sacrificing type of this emotion of love, affection and passion. This would show that you are cleansing yourself from the wrong Satanic kind of this emotion, and thus revealing that God is truly dwelling in you and not Lucifer. But if you knowingly choose not to follow God’s will in these matters, then you would be expressing and manifesting the false self-pleasing and selfish type of this emotion of love, affection and passion. This would show that you are making yourself more filthy, and thus reveal that Lucifer is truly dwelling in you and not God.